Before I Go . . .

Before I Go. . . . .

I Love giving referrals even more than I appreciate receiving referrals. I get a feeling almost as if it were Christmas and I am presenting this beautifully wrapped gift to someone and watching their face as they open the package. I was asked recently how I am able to come across so many people who need referrals. It is a small thing and yet it delivers BIG results; I ask one simple question. It goes something like this.

“Before I Go, is there anything I can do to help you today?” I usually get a reply like ‘Huh” or “What do you mean?” My reply routinely is something to the effect of “I happen to have an incredible network of business partners/associates that I know, like and trust so if you need a resource, product or service I may know just the right person for you.

Why do I do this you might ask? I feel that the most valuable asset we have is being a resource to our clients and associates. I want to be their “go to” person so I have spent years cultivating a finely crafted network of the best of the best business professionals. These are people who come highly recommended to me or I have personally used their products or services. I have make it known that I would like to get to know them better and I keep track of what they are doing and if their work matches their words. When I have someone that needs their services I contact them and let them know I have a referral for them and let them know what my expectations are for the way the referral should be handled.

What I have found is that my clients value my referrals and taking away some of the uncertainty out of finding the right resource. I also discovered that the person receiving the referral is appreciative of the gesture of being handed a potential client.

With the “Before I Go (BIG)”goodbye I get a Big return – both the referrer and referee frequently think of me first when they hear of someone looking for my services. I get the pleasure of helping not just one person but two or more people. I become a trusted resource. It works equally well when I am looking for someone or something. “Before I go, I am thinking about putting a new deck on my house. Who do you know that you might recommend to me?

I always wanted to be able to do magic when I was a child and by connecting the right people it becomes almost magical for me. Just call me Dawne the ReSorceress .

Growing Your Network

I have heard that there is a type of bamboo that you plant, water, fertilize, nurture, and for three years see nothing, not a shoot, not a leave, NOTHING. After three years a tiny sprout appears and the bamboo starts to grow, really grow 4 to 6 feet a day until it is ready to harvest.

It must take a huge leap of faith to put that much time, effort, and attention into something without seeing any sign of what is to come. I like this story because it reminds me a lot of forming a successful network; the nice part is that to build a business network foundation shouldn’t take three years. It is a process that can grow as fast as or faster than the bamboo. The seed takes root and sprouts immediately upon your acknowledgment that having the right network is the only way to be successful.

We already have a foundation of a network with the people have in our everyday world. Family, friends, co-workers, alumni, make the base of our network. We utilize that base to reach out to their connections. We need to ASK to GET. Our friends and family members are not psychic. If we don’t let them know the type of people we are looking to meet, they won’t automatically make the introductions. In fact most of us never think of letting those closest to us know that we are trying to expand our network. When you consider the fact that each of us know 250 to 500 people well, the number of people those closet to us could add to our network is phenomenal.

Networking is both an art and a science. Some people are more naturally attuned to opportunities than others. Even the painfully shy can learn how to expand their networks when they realize that the possibilities are everywhere and that people are waiting to get to know them. It does take a plan to expedite the process.

What a concept, a plan to network! It needs to be programmed into your workday. If the concept seems alien, put it into prospective. If it was a requirement of your position that you network for a set amount of time each day, you would do it. Well, guess what, it is a requirement, whether you work for yourself or someone else. You might survive if you avoid becoming an exceptional networker, but that is all you will do is survive. Being an actively engaged business networker is the only road to success. You cannot make it with any level of true accomplishment without engaging others.

The first thing is to decide who it is that you need in your network. You want to have a balance between people who have the resources you need and resources for you to have to help your clients and your contacts. It is easier than it sounds. Depending on your field there are some people/professions that are more naturally connected to the type of people you need to know. When you have determined who these people are you need to find where they, meet, socialize, play etc. Build time in your calendar every day to work on adding to your network. Some days it will be researching, others will be attending events, and then there is the follow-up.

Follow-up consists of “face time.” Some try to shortcut the process by building relationships online or on the phone. While both of these play a part in the process, it is spending time getting to know people in person that is what turns a casual contact into a real relationship. Think of it like a dating service – you might e-mail and call, but it doesn’t become the real thing until you actually meet. Once you have spent some time in the courtship phase, you will know if it something that is mutually beneficial or one-sided. For someone to truly be part of your network it needs to be mutually beneficial. It is when you have a number of these strong two way relationships you will be able to see the rapid growth of your resources , you become to go to person, and success is assured.

Growing People

An ancient Chinese proverb advises

If you want one year of prosperity, grow grain

If you want ten years of prosperity, grow trees

If you want a hundred years of prosperity, grow people.


My Grandfather, Arthur Aloysius Leroy “Heart-breaker” Maguire was a people grower. I thought he was a people collector, but in my reflections I now know he was a people grower. He was a projectionist in movie theaters during the Great Depression. While he did well, and his family never did without the necessities, he made sure that anyone he came in contact with was ok too. But more than making sure they were feed and had a place to lay their head, he made sure they had encouragement, and the feeling that someone believed in them and they were connected to the resources they needed.


He had a big head; as a child I didn’t realize that it was the look of an Irishman’s Irishman, I just thought that he knew everything and had to have a big brain to hold it all. He had wonderful expressions, which I didn’t understand, but sounded wise and made me think. One of my favorites, ‘you can lead a horse to water, you can’t make him drink, but you can salt their oats and make them thirsty;’ wow, when I finally got that one it was a life changing epiphany.


He had a network that was incredible; people who he could trust to do what they said, when, where and how they said because they so respected him, they could never conceive of letting him down. If anyone needed anything or wanted to know something, they came to Mac - if he didn't know the right person, they weren't worth knowing.


I aspire to be that person, the person who helps people see their inner glory, to open their awareness, help them to recognize when they give their best, the world’s best might find its way back to them. More importantly, that this is a no score proposition, when others win, we all win, but you don’t help others to win so you will, but because it is just the right thing to do.

Keep Your Options Open

The job market is insane - job today- gone tomorrow. As a professional speaker/consultant in the area of networking, I have an increasing number of clients seeking my help to find jobs utilizing networking techniques. I often have to explain that the concept of networking is built on the premise of building relationships, not having a ninja relationship where you drop in anonymously, strike out and hope to hit something that works.

Networking isn't an accidental process; it is the deliberate creation of lifelong, mutually beneficial relationships. That being said it doesn’t mean in these challenging times that it isn’t ok and necessary to try to revitalize old or existing contacts as long as you sincerely mean to nurture and grow value based relationships.

So look in the cobwebbed corners of your mind and dust off some of those old relationships. When you reconnect, catch up for a few minutes before sharing your tale of woe about seeking new employment. Then be honest, maybe even apologize for having lost touch and let them know that you plan on rebuilding your friendship/relationship. Now is the time to state your circumstances and see if they would consider sharing any ideas that might help you in your job hunt.

If you ever want to be taken seriously, the most important part starts now. You follow up with a hand written, mailed (snail mail) note, thanking them for their time and confirming any follow-up you might have agreed upon. You now add them to your contact management system and build a plan to keep in touch. When the great day comes and you find that new shiny career path, make sure you thank any and all who assisted, advised, prayed, or just listened. Then keep nourishing, building, growing and sharing with others.

Growing People

An ancient Chinese proverb advises

If you want one year of prosperity, grow grain

If you want ten years of prosperity, grow trees

If you want a hundred years of prosperity, grow people.

My Grandfather, Arthur Aloysius Leroy “Heart-breaker” Maguire was a people grower. I thought he was a people collector, but in my reflections I now know he was a people grower. He was a projectionist in movie theaters during the Great Depression. While he did well, and his family never did without the necessities, he made sure that anyone he came in contact with was ok too. But more than making sure they were feed and had a place to lay their head, he made sure they had encouragement, and the feeling that someone believed in them and they were connected to the resources they needed.

He had a big head; as a child I didn’t realize that it was the look of an Irishman’s Irishman, I just thought that he knew everything and had to have a big brain to hold it all. He had wonderful expressions, which I didn’t understand, but sounded wise and made me think. One of my favorites, ‘you can lead a horse to water, you can’t make him drink, but you can salt their oats and make them thirsty;’ wow, when I finally got that one it was a life changing epiphany.

He had a network that was incredible; people who he could trust to do what they said, when, where and how they said because they so respected him, they could never conceive of letting him down. If anyone needed anything or wanted to know something, they came to Mac - if he didn't know the right person, they weren't worth knowing.

I aspire to be that person, the person who helps people see their inner glory, to open their awareness, help them to recognize when they give their best, the world’s best might find its way back to them. More importantly, that this is a no score proposition, when others win, we all win, but you don’t help others to win so you will, but because it is just the right thing to do.